I've been trying to think of a way to get in Changing Rooms to re-decorate my scrapping den. Changing Rooms have never done a craft room - as far as I know - so surely it might be a worthwhile and considered challenge should I write to them? What does put me off, however, is ending up with someone like Anna Ryder-Richardson doing the room in huge 1970s retro geometric wallpaper, with a fluffy pink spherical seat swinging off the ceiling. No offence, Anna, but I want cool, dignified, and above all - storage! And my ceiling won't take a swinging chair, either.

There is also the problem that I know what I want, you see, and am untrusting of any neighbours coming into my room and not being persuaded into something completely "not" scrapping. I'm wondering if feasibly we can do some kind of fake swap before the TV crew's arrival, where Laurence and co end up thinking I'm the neighbour, coming to do someone else's craft room. That way I wouldn't have to bother with actually stripping and painting someone else's little bedroom I care little about, too. If this cunning plan worked, I would then only have to worry about stealthily going around behind Handy Andy with my tape measure, trying to work out whether he's getting the size of the storage shelves right for all my cardstock and pretty patterned papers.

When we bought the house three years ago, we chose it for the spaciousness. The previous owner had added a huge extension, including a 21-foot living room and a den at the end of it. Originally I started scrapping in a spare upstairs bedroom, then realised what a fool I was, and moved down to what now has become my scrapping den (actual name pending - my Man-Around-the-House and I are still arguing over ownership and naming rights). One bonus is that the room is soundproofed - possibly against old owner's usage of electric guitars, but it works for eyelet setting too. The room was originally my MATH's. He has a large leather armchair, a wide screen TV, and a Playstation 2 in there. All are used most weekends for the male practice of "relaxing" i.e. watching sport, or playing games. Apart from these "embellishments", the room is occupied with a large semi-circular built in desk, backed by a set of ranch sliders giving great light; and many plastic bins, or iris-like carts full of my scrapping supplies. Oh, and one cheap Ikea bookshelf, with all the shelves caving in at the weight of my obsessively hoarded supply of every glossy scrapbooking magazine or book available on the current or historical marketplace. Books and supplies are taking over the carpet now. Which is sometimes a good thing, because they cover over the red scribble on the beige carpet where mummy was kind enough to lend her scrapping pens but then forgot to watch over their usage by toddler daughter on several quality family sharing occasions.

What I want is wall-to-wall-to-ceiling-to-floor built in storage, and then some free clean wall space to hang three 12x12 frames to show off my latest and greatest masterpieces. All in clean art gallery white. At the moment, the scrapping den is muralled in Egyptian designs - inherited from the previous lady owner, who claimed to be not only an interior designer herself but had worked with Laurence Lewellyn-Bowen before. I'm not sure Laurence would approve of me asking for the Egyptian men and women lounging across my walls (and desk) to be painted over with magnolia blandness, then. That's another problem around my Changing Room plans.

They can leave the TV in there, too - something Changing Rooms seem to treat with as much contempt as Garden Force does with rotary clothes lines. Perhaps even add in a free satellite box, so that I'm not forced to watch the Eastender's Omnibus Edition during my weekend afternoon scrapping sessions. Leave the Playstation in there, too. That way I might see my MATH occasionally, even if I'm always pleading for him to turn off that monotonous horse-racing game music he's so fond of.

Which brings me to my other designer conundrum - I chose magnolia-white, because it is so opposite the current black and red of the Egyptian decor we have - even the ceiling is a reddish-pink. Now red - we know that red is used in many restaurants because it makes people hungry (which might explain my need for chocolate eclairs whilst scrapping in there currently), and pink is used for its calming nature in prisons. But what colour makes you more creative - without actually impacting your design choices in the first place? After delving into the internet for an hour, looking into colour science, my decision remains unfounded but also un-changed. Blue might do, because it evokes dreams and fantasy; green might do because of its calming and naturalistic tendencies; orange is playful and sunshine in a can; yellow is youthful and friendly; and no wonder I'm not enjoying red at the moment - it's apparently bloody and revolting (I'm quoting a website!). Ah, but purple is the colour I'm meant to have - stimulating, inspiring, spiritual - what a pity it's not a great favourite of mine - plastered across four walls. At least not without making me feel like I've walked into some royal den of inequity somewhere. All my layouts would end up with sumptuous velvet, brocade gold ribbons, and the odd crown emblem on 'em too. Happy kiddy layouts would'nt have a hope. Summer cool layouts - nah-ah. So, I'm sticking to white - it's pure, it's clean, it's light, and above all, it's empty. Lots more space for all my scrapping supplies, then! I'm not sure how Changing Rooms would like that, though?.

Now, where's that Changing Rooms address?